Trip to Martinsville, VA

We spent the weekend in Virginia with Lee's family. It was cold and wet. I didn't want to go. But it was important to Lee.

It turned out to be a nice weekend and I had some long-overdue down time. When everybody else went to the Nascar race, I stayed at the campsite by myself. I was literally stranded with nothing to do. Sounds heavenly, doesn't it?


My beautiful sister-in-law and her son Aiden. I love my nephew.




Aiden LOVES 'ivia




This is what the outside of the racetrack looks like.


Boo spent the day with his daddy at the races. They had a good time together.




I love to watch my boy in the woods.


This is Danny. He's my nephews' Daddy. He works very hard and is good with the kids.

This is Livvy making a precious face. She looks beautiful, doesn't she? Actually, she just got scolded and is trying to make her daddy feel bad about it. It doesn't work, but it makes a great picture. She is testing us in so many ways and she is really growing.

She has such a sweet and loving spirit. She is so open and so trusting. It terrifies me! I could never send her away to school. I can hardly let her out of my sight. She wants to hug and be friends wit everybody. I don't want to kill that, but I don't want her to be vulnerable to all the evil in the world, either.


Lijah just said, "Aiden, why don't you go play with Olivia?" He was very polite about it, and it madeus all crack up laughing. Lij is not very good at sharing his playtime; he really values independent time (like his Mama). But he takes correction well and will learn.


Although it was nice, I am very glad to be home. I had a chill the entire time, and the kids and I all took long hot baths when we got home. I am ready to get back to working on the house. I desperately want to get over there with a vacuum and a digital camera!!

House of God

As of today, Lee and I are now the owners of a mobile home. This home is only five minutes from my parents house, 10 minutes from my work, and fifteen minutes from Nan's. It has a very small yard of its own. The park it resides in is inexpensive and quiet. The home is ours - we paid cash for it. It needs work, but out of nowhere God's people are swarming to "get it fixed up" for us. That is something I wasn't even expecting. I am so humbled and so grateful. I have never asked for this much prayer in my life, and God has really come through for us.

We will spend the next month moving in slowly, getting it cleaned up and up to shape. I am going to name it "House of God" or something similar, because it really is.

I will post more later.

"As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord." Joshua 24:15

Just to Make You Laugh

Today I am delighted by the fact that when we opened up the firebox, we realized that we have all our birth certificates & social security cards. They are safe and secure.

Lee took me to get my driver's license renewed and it was easy.

I feel like such a grown up.

I mentioned this to Lee, and he said it had nothing to do with being grown up - that it was just a reflection of how much he (personally) 'rocked'.

(He had told me we had everything we needed and I didn't believe him.)

Livvy's Easter

I used elements from Digital Design Element's Snapshots of Spring Mega Kit and from J. Nelson's Baby Bee Good kit.

A Few Special Moments

We spent the morning at home and the afternoon and evening at my SIL Jackie's house. Here are a few special pictures that don't fit in the other categories.

Here is beautiful Olivia in her beautiful dress. I can not tell you how happy I am with this dress. We got it at the sale last week for $5. It wears like a $50 dress. Not that I would know from experience, I'm just saying! My daughter looked so lovely and I was so pleased.

Here is my beloved holding my darling nephew. He held Damien for about an hour and a half when we first arrived. He wouldn't let me take him! Lee loves kids, and it makes me so happy to watch him with them. I thank God for this man.

And here is me with my neffie poo. I have been wanting to try out my Moby wrap. When everyone was eating I snuck into a room and loaded him up. Everyone laughed at it, and at goofy me. But they saw right away how useful and practical it was. Damien loved being worn. I wore him for three hours and had my hands free. I ate dinner, helped with the kids, helped with the Easter egg hunt, and just hung out, all while holding the baby. He was happy as a clam. I have read that the moby can be hard to use at first, but I found it to be quite easy. The only thing that might be tricky is learning to nurse in it, but practice makes perfect.

Cousins

Here is Liv and six-month old Damien. She is fairly gentle with him, thank goodness. I hope that wears off. I don't have any pictures to show how Elijah is with him. Basically, both of my kids olike babies. Please Lord, let the trend carry!

Aiden is your typical two year old caveboy. He is my first nephew and I love him to little bits.

Here are all the little cousins being rowdy and throwing stuff.

Here is Sam. She is a cousin to Lee and I - she was four when I first met her at our wedding. She is growing into a lovely young lady. When we go to the races at Martinsville next wedding (oh yeah by the way) I will probably get to spend some time with her.

Cousins Annual Easter Egg Hunt

Easter Baskets at Home

I was so worried about last night that I realized I didn't plan a breakfast for the morning. Whoops. Next year we are so doing Monkey bread.



Daddy really wanted to get his kids one of those themed baskets - I had already stocked up on candy and goodies. We ended up with waaay too much. The kids handle it pretty well.

Princess Liv got a princess basket. Her hair always looks like this in the morning. So does mine.

Boo got a Go Diego Go basket. Lee chose it and I think he chose well. Boo loved the stupid little pieces. I mean he loved 'em. If we don't catch bugs this summer, well, I will be very surprised.

Easter Vigil Narrative

My class met about 45 minutes before the service started. After getting Lee and Nan situated in the sanctuary, I thought it would feel like forever till we started, but it didn't. It blinked by. Then we went outside to light the Easter fire. Father Weiss and Deacon Gorman prayed over the fire, then lit the Paschal candle. We each had a little candle which was lit off the Paschal candle and off each other's candles. Then we processed in.



The beginning of the service is very dark. While we held our little candles, Fr. Weiss sang The Exsultet. This is very beautiful tradition hymn that is used to start the Easter services. The words are stirring. For example: "What good would life have been to us, had Christ not come as our Redeemer?"



Then we extinguished our candles and had the Liturgy of the Word. The liturgy of the word is when the scripture readings are read. I love the readings at the Easter Vigil because they are intended to draw us through salvation history, starting with Adam and Eve, and going on up to the Resurrection. It is so awesome. After the Old Testament readings and the New Testament readings, interspersed with the singing of the psalms, finally comes the gospel readings. The gospel is especially honored, with incense and with a chorus of alleluias. We all stand during the reading of the gospel. The Deacon read the gospel - he is the one that reminds me of Poppa.



Then Fr. Weis gave his homily. He talked about how there are things in life that make us leap for joy, and the resurrection should be one of those things - we should be leaping for joy, at least metaphorically. Our joy should be such that people want to know where it comes from. It was very good!



After the homily came the blessing of the holy water for the year. Lee was very surprised to be hit in the face by water :) The blessing of the congregation with Holy Water is done once a month at our church, so I am used to it and I love it - Elijah loves it too! I forgot to warn Lee, though...

After that, we were confirmed. We had to stand in front of the congregation. Fr. Weiss laid his hands on us and prayed for the Holy Spirit to come upon us in a deeper way. Then we were marked with the sign of the cross with anointing oil and our confirmation names were announced. My patron saint is Saint Ann, the mother of Mary and grandmother of Jesus. I ask her to pray for me when I need help with something in my vocation of wife and motherhood. This doesn't replace praying to God - it's not the same thing -I am asking her to pray with me, in the same way that I ask my mom or Michelle or Vicky at work to pray for me - because they are all also moms and wives and I feel like they can come beside me and pray with me. We are all praying to God together.

I could smell the oil on my head for the rest of the evening and it is a really good smell :)

After we were confirmed, it was time for the liturgy of the Eucharist. A regular Mass only has the Liturgy of the Word (the scripture readings, though not usually quite as long as the ones at the vigil) and the Liturgy of the Eucharist. So once we started this, I felt *almost* relaxed. I have been to Mass enough times that I know what is going to happen now. The difference is, this time I would be able to go up and receive the Lord. I have been waiting a long time for that. That's enough to say about that for now. This is where the whole thing is like a marriage. Now I have access to the sacramental presence of the Lord for the rest of my life, wherever there is a Mass, I can go in and receive Him. Awesome.

Afterwards we processed out. All my teachers hugged me, Michelle hugged me, and then a barrage of total strangers were hugging me and saying congratulations - a welcome to the family. Deacon Gorman and Fr. Weiss hugged me. I was very tired and a little overwhelmed, but very happy. I was worried that my family was cranky, but I was worrying in vain. Everybody was fine, even cranky Lee who said that I "so totally owe him". (I told him we'd renegotiate who owes who what after I gave birth to his third child.) I also thought everyone would want to run home, but instead we were almost the last ones to leave. Everyone was milling and chatting. Even Lee. I got hugs from my parents and Nan. Michelle and Nan took pictures for each other.

Then it was over. We went back to Nan's to pick the kids up. Again I thought we would rush home, but Lee plopped on the couch to finish a basketball game and I had time to go slowly through my amazing presents (I don't want to sound selfish by talking about presents too much but let's just say I was very very blessed!!)

Then we went home and put together the kids Easter baskets and went to bed. I slept like a rock

Easter Vigil Thank Yous

Emotionally, last night felt like a wedding. It fuzzed and flurried by and then it was over. But now that it is over, I remember it strongly and happily, even though I was preoccupied with saying or doing the wrong thing the whole time. It was a night that I will never forget.

I asked Grandma Sheila to watch the kids so that Nan could be there. Nan believes that all "religions" are the same, and so it's not a 'big deal' for her. But if it is important to me, she wants to be there for me. It's nice to have someone like that.

Plus I needed her to sit with Lee. Of everyone that was there to support me last night, Lee was obviously foremost. This has actually affected him, and will continue to affect him. He has sacrificially given up his sacred Monday nights with his best friend for the better part of eight months. Lee's not really doctrinally opposedto the church, but he thinks that the church has done so much evil throughout history (such as the crusades and the spanish inquisition) that it is a corrupt institution run by corrupt men. He thinks that about a lot of things, it's nothing personal. He likes to say he is an equal opportunity hater. Anyway, he also just doesn't like sitting through two hours of pomp and circumstance. What was my point again? Oh, yeah, my point was, despite his general dislike for the Catholic church and his dislike of anything structured and/or ceremonial, he was there for me last night because he loves me and supports me, no other reason. I can't tell you how much I appreciate that. I know you'll never read this, Lee, but thank you. You are my best friend and I don't know if I could have done this without your support. You are amazing.

He did say he liked the incense though :)

My parents were there, too, with a couple of my brothers. I was never sure if I should invite them or not. My joining the Catholic church is not exactly a celebratory matter for them. They love me and they know that my faith is sincere, but they are not Catholics nor did they [intentionally] raise me to be a Catholic [although most of the reasons I became a Catholic are because of their raisin'!! but that's a story for my book, lol]. But I decided to ask them to come because they are my parents and we love each other. I didn't want something that was so important to me to exclude them. It just wouldn't be the same.

But they were amazing. My dad looked the vigil up ahead of time and found out what the readings were. My mom was really nervous. I didn't know where they were at first but then I heard Mommi cough! If they were upset, they didn't show it. They were really nice and positive about the whole thing, and even gave me a very special present that I am going to write a separate blog post about. They got me a card that was very appropriate and had the whole family sign it. They made me feel so loved and supported. Thank you guys. I felt like you were looking at the good things instead of the bad and that means so much to your kid. It takes master-level parenting skills to be so supportive. It meant so much to me.

And then there was my sponsor, Michelle. Michelle is a friend of my mom's who has become my friend now, too. She's an adoptive mom like mom. When she found out that I wanted to be in the RCIA program last year, she made it easy for me to go by offering to go along with me. She has prayed for me and alongside me, answered questions for me, and related her own experiences to help me. She has been everything a sponsor should be. Originally I thought I would be one of those people who had to ask one of the teachers to be my sponsor - but instead I got a great friend and a real helper!

Well, this has turned into a let's thank the academy speech, so I'm going to close it an open up another entry to run a quick narrative so I can try to remember what happened instead of the whole thank you thing. Obviously, I am a very grateful girl.

My Wallpaper

Here is my current desktop wallpaper. I used paper and elements from ShabbyPrincess.com. It's simple but adorable. Great picture, Mommi!

Friday/Saturday

Friday night Lee ordered me to RELAX instead of doing my weekly chores. He wanted me to sit down and watch a movie without doing anything else (LOL....). But I did relax. I took a bath and read, then bathed each of the kids and had quality conversation time with them. I ran some loads of laundry and figured I'd fold it all while waiting for him to get home... or maybe just go to bed a little earlier... so I'm gettin ready to tuck in when Lee calls and informs me (at 11:30pm) that he will be bringing friends over to hang out after work. This gives me an hour, and guess what... I didn't do my chores. The kitchen floor needs mopped, the bathroom needs tidied, and let's not even think about the rest of the house. Everything is either in boxes or on the floor. It's a nightmare. And it's 11:30 at night.

I could have gotten really angry, but I really want my husband to feel free to bring his friends home. One of his friends is going home to Pakistan this week to be married (an arranged marriage). He won't see this guy again for months if ever. So I tease him a little about the last minute notice, then prioritize. I clean up the kitchen, make sure there are enough dishes for four sloppy boys, and most importantly clean the bathroom!! Then I have a choice - make snacks or mop the kitchen floor. I figured that the boys would rather have food than a perfectly clean floor, so I put out a plate of soft pretzels with some dips, and some cookies. I get dressed again so I can greet them nicely.

So I do, I say hello, and good night. Give my husband a kiss and go to bed, then let the rest go.

As I lay in bed I can hear them chattering, and I think about how nice it is, just being married to a guy (warts and all). I could have gotten so mad or even said NO WAY, but instead I can listen to him and his friends buzzing with boring male conversation as I doze off. It's good.

Saturday was a special tradition for me and Nan - twice a year we go out and buy a new wardrobe for the kids. We start very early - 6:30am. That's why I didn't stay up with the boys, not that I really would have wanted to. Unfortunately my alarm forgot to go off (ahem) and the first sound I heard was the phone ringing at 6:45! So we skipped out usual full breakfast and went to McDonalds, then got in line for the KMOMS sale in Mechanicsburg. We did really well, our finds will be in another post. They have mostly stuff for littles, so we will have to find a new strategy when the kids get bigger.

Saturday night, Lee and Jon were going to a basketball game. One of Lee's friends gave him FREE tickets to the 76ers game! That's a pretty big deal. They had a lot of fun.

Me and the kids went to the vigil mass. I did have to take Olivia out once, but I had to use the bathroom anyway, so it wasn't a problem. I was explaining to Olivia about the gifts being brought forward and the priest offering them to God, and she asked me a question about the "cup with beer in it".... I really had to choke back a laugh on that one.


It is Passion Sunday, or Palm Sunday. Here are the crosses we made with our Holy Palms. We will hang them up on our walls until next year. I got the directions from here.

Spring Shopping

Here is one of Olivia's beautiful new dresses:


And the adorable pink poncho that mommy just had to have.

Here are Julius's play onesies. More than enough for the summer.

And a few nicer outfits for church and some warm things for sleep.

Olivia didn't actually need very much, so we resolved not to buy much for her. But its really hard not to buy clothes for Olivia!! I got more dresses because I love to see my little girl in dresses. I am a little more strict with how she dresses because I am super conscious of the need for little girls to be modest little girls. So if Nan isn't sure of something, she will run it by me, and she always respects what I say. I appreciate that.

And here are her shorts outfits.

Here is Boo's wardrobe. This is more than he really needs, even though it looks like less than Livvy got. His clothes were very, very cheap.

This is a swim suit that he got. It might actually last him two years.

We spent less than $100 on clothes, and it will last the kids well into fall. We got a few non-clothes things, too, but I am bored with blogging now and I hear Lee playing with the kids. Maybe I will show the other things later!

This is just another example of how richly God provides for the kids he has given me and Lee, and I am very grateful.

Luke 7:47

Last night, I made my first confession.


I thought about throwing together a little apologetics course about the biblical basis for confession, but I'm afraid I would lose my readers. If you want more information about the Biblical basis, I recommend Scott Hahn's article on the ministries of healing and reconciliation, available on the web for free.


It was probably in listening to Father Larry's free cd on confession that I became convinced that such a thing was real and that I wanted it in my life. This was close to two years ago, so basically, its something I've been waiting a long time for.


All day at work I knew that it was going to be tonight. It was like standing in line at a roller coaster. There's really nothing you can do but wait. You can get out of line if you want to, but you don't want to. You can't make time go slower or faster.


There isn't quite enough time between work and class, so I ate at work and was about five minutes late for class. I was already upset because Lee and I had gotten passed over for one of the homes we were looking into. The class already knows that we are looking for a place to live and is praying for us, and there is nothing too odd about seeing a 7 months pregnant woman crying. Michelle handed me a tissue and once I let it out I was fine. And then it was time.


We made a line to go in and talk to Father. I ended up at the back of the line, partly because I was terrified, but msotly because I had to go to the bathroom. I had no desire to run over my list of sins with a full bladder. Of course by the time I got to the front of the line I had to go again. It didn't really matter. We were in the chapel and it was terribly quiet. Michelle sat in the pew praying for me and with me the whole time - that was very, very helpful. It was good not to be alone. I didn't feel like anyone else was as scared as I was. Maybe other people's sins aren't as embarassing at mine - or maybe they weren't raised to be as conscious of their need for God's grace. More likely, everybody was scared and just putting on a brave face.

Finally, it was my turn. I shut the door to the confessional behind me and sat down across from Father. I don't mind admitting that I am a sinner, but saying the specific words out loud was very hard and I cried the whole time. It did not take very long. I ripped the band aid off, and it hurt, and then it was over. When I was done, he encouraged me. He shared the love and mercy of God with me. He gave me something to do, so that I can replace the bad things in my life with good things. Then, with the authority of the disciples, as given by Jesus and passed down through history to him, and by the power of the cross, he forgave me.


And this is what is so amazing about the Catholic faith - the priesthood is about the healing ministries of Jesus being there for us on an individual basis, as well as in a universal family. People say that "religion" (by which they generally mean the sacraments) is wrong, because it takes away from having a personal religion with Jesus. Yes, some people have used it that way. But that's not what it's supposed to be. It was me and Jesus in there. Father Weiss is someone who has given up literally everything just so he could be Jesus to me in that room. This is exactly what the new testament calls us to do; all in different ways.

I don't think I can capture with words what it was like - bringing not just some, but all of the ugly up out of my life and presenting it as my own fault. I am used to adjusting my image to make myself look good. To present an honest image of myself and receive mercy from a human being, acting in the person of Christ. I can't describe it. It's awesome. It's humiliating, humbling, raw, honest, and awesome.


And it's not that I don't believe my sins were forgiven before, when I would just tell Jesus that I was sorry. Can and does God forgive people just because they are very sorry? Of course, he's God. He does what he wants. You have to look at sin like a sickness. If you get cancer, you can pray that God will heal you. He can, and he will. But as humans with physical bodies, we need doctors to help us get well. So we go to the doctor, and the doctor helps us be healed. Is the doctor taking the place of God? Of course not. Everything the doctor does is through God. Even more so for the priest, who is a doctor for his people. I find that my protestant friends, who believe only in confessing to God, are emulating confession all the time. This week, they might have new accountability partners. Last week, they met with their pastor to talk about their sin and how to break free of it. This is a real human need, and I consider myself so blessed to be joining a church that acknowledges that.


Afterwards, Michelle gave me a big hug and I cried some more, but I was happy. Then we had the walkthrough for the Easter vigil mass, which is next Saturday the 22nd. I had a hard time concentrating on what we are supposed to do, but it's not that hard. We pretty much only have to say "I do" and "amen". I guess it's like getting married, everybody knows you will be too overwhelmed to remember everything complicated so they try to make it simple but meaningful. Of course Julius decided to start acting up during the practice, and I made Michelle feel his little... I dunno, something pokey like a knee or an elbow.



Technically, we have one more class period after this, but I won't be able to make it next week, so that's it. So now I am just waiting for the Vigil Mass. It's hard to believe.

Family Visit

This is Uncle Petey. He is Nan's baby, therefore Lee's uncle. He and his wife live in Wisconsin and are in for a visit. The kids took right to them.

This is one of my beloved nephews. He was in my arms for hours last night, as Jackie came down to Nan's to also visit Uncle Petey. This is the little boy born last August that I asked you all to pray for because he was having seizures. He is a very healthy little butterball now. He and his brother are the happiest babies I have ever seen. Jackie and her boyfriend work very hard to take care of them and are good parents.

Nan is proud of her seven (including Julius) great-grandchildren. She doesn't really approve of us all having babies, but once they are here she can't help loving them. Look at Damien's precious smile.

This is Aiden, my other little nephew. He's two. He's a dollbaby. He was actually picking on Olivia. If you can picture Olivia actually being picked on, well, it was priceless. She kept calling him "Aiden Alan" and bossing him around, but then when he took her books or blankies she just cried. Oh, he wasn't picking on her in this picture, this is a hug. He adores her. He's just full of mischief.

Grandma Sheila got out of jail on Friday. She made beautiful crocheted blankies for all of her grandbabies, including Julius. She also spent a lot of time in a Bible study. She now has three bibles and wants to stop swearing and drinking too much. She has friends who are going to take her to church and she is reading through the new testament. This could be so amazing for her. Please say a little prayer that God's word will find fertile soil in our Grandma's heart (this is Lee's mom, she is living with Nan, Lee's grandma) and that I will be able to be a good witness to her and provide her with the right kind of support.

Update: Poor Nan just called crying because Uncle Petey left two days early- she took Sunday - Wednesday off of work to spend time with his family. Then at lunch today they informed her that they were leaving right away today to go to Atlantic City with Uncle Pork. Now Nan has three days off (think lost wages on a paycheck to paycheck income) and her baby is gone. Is there another side to this story? Maybe, I don't know. All I know is that my Nan is sad and if someone took off work to spend time with me, I would want to spend it with them, too. :(

Frugal Shopping Notes

BTW, Aldi's opened up by Big Lots. They have good prices on some things, others you are better off at the bigger store with a sale price and a coupon combined. Their eggs, milk, sugar and flour prices are pretty much rock bottom. Produce seemed pretty decent, but you can get cheaper at the groery store at the right time. Cereal prices are not better than a sale at the big chain. All in all worth shopping at if you don't have time to cut coupons and watch sales or if you need something that is not on sale right now.

I get this stuff at Big Lots, $3.00 for a box. It really makes a difference for me, personally. However it does NOT taste good. Boo will still take one of their lozenges, but Livvy probably would not.

If you need things for lunches, like fruit snacks and cheese & cracker packs, and cheap individual drinks, Big Lots is the best I know of right now. R&S was better but they closed down. :(

Big Lots also has very good prices on things like deodorant and shampoo. If you want a certain brand, they can rip you off, but if you dig around they usually have one or two deals that are unbeatable. Their toilet paper is never better than on sale with a coupon at the grocery store - but again if its not on sale or you don't have a coupon, their base price is better.

Just a Few Pics

Absolutely priceless. But what you want to watch for is the age in her face. This is not the face of a baby girl.

Here again - look at how old my little boy is. He's so sophisticated in his speech. You know what would make you laugh? Hearing him speak to a waitress. He orders his own food and drink. "I would like two pancakes, please. Do you have chocolate milk?" Somehow by completely sheltering him, we have created a completely socially comfortable child. Go figure.

Final thought - imagine how devastating it is to be seven and a half months pregnant and have to 'dispose of' the absolutely helpless newborn children of, well, terrorists. What was I supposed to do, leave them in the basement so I can catch them in traps later when they are ugly devastators? Make them pets? (Oh, don't think I wasn't tempted. I had to call Lee at work to make him tell me NO you absolutely can not put feral mice babies into a cage and try to feed them.) Later, the mother came back for them. She went nuts. It was heartbreaking. Seriously. She threw herself against a table leg.

Anyway, back to my life. I ask everyone to continue to pray energy and peace and strength for me. I want to get back to working on the basement right now, but my body is saying DON'T YOU DARE. Bits and pieces of me that shouldn't be are twitching and squeezing. Nuf said.

I am SOOOO glad I did not take five classes this semester. I love you, my wise Lee.

True story - he told me the other day that I wasn't taking care of myself. I was so hurt. I had forgotten to put mascara on and was wearing my home maternity clothes, so didn't look the best and thought that was what he was saying. Well, he was actually saying that I needed to take naps. HA. Never assume with Lee.

Pray for Lee, too, please. He is trying to graduate, transfer to a new school, support a family, and have a baby all at the same time. Yes, I am going to school and working, too, but the real weight falls on his big shoulders.