Life Isn't Fair

Sarah, my beloved sister, has gone. Sarah is one of my most favorite people in the whole world. I mean that very strongly. She is talented and funny, and very interesting. In some ways, I feel like I know her so well, and then sometimes she totally surprises me. She can make me laugh like no one else in the world, about the most trivial things. Once again, I didn't get nearly as much time with her as I would have liked. She came with her husband Curtis and his darling daughter, Aurora. And now they are all gone.

Life is so unfair.

Not because Sarah and Curtis are living in San Diego, which is something like 2700 miles away. After all, if Sarah had not gone into the Navy, in her exact job, she would most likely never have met Curtis. And I like Curtis a lot. And he makes her happy. He loves her, and she loves him. So, yes, they are thousnads of miles away, but they are together. That is not why life is unfair.

And t's not because God only knows if or when we will ever see this darling little niece again. When Olivia said this morning, "Mom, do you know who I want to see? I want to se Aurora. She is so cute", it was all I could do not to cry as I tried to explain to her that Aurora has a Mommy who loves her and wants her to be with her. I mean, seriously, who wouldn't love Aurora? Through these chancy circumstances, we met her. She happens to be family. But she doesn't belong to us. I'm drying the tears now, but I know it's not unfair that a little girl go home to her mother.

It's not even because next month, my brother will be heading out to war, and my sister in all likelihood to South America to work in an orphanage. Farther away than ever, and in danger, too. But Curtis chose to be a Marine - and he's damn proud of it, and I am proud of it, too. And my sister, how could I be any prouder of her? This is who she is, and the fact that it takes her far away may be painful for me, but its not unfair.

The only thing that is unfair about all of this is that life is so beautiful that it swings people like this in our path, for however short a time. I feel blessed beyond what I deserve, that such people exist, that they are my family, and that I am lucky enough to know them. And, geez, I'm not trying to glorify anybody. I know they're just people, with plenty of flaws. But though Aurora will not remember me, I will remember her smile and it fills my heart with happiness. And my sister, and her husband, they are my friends, and they're out there and I love them. It's a blessing beyond comprehension.

"All men have the stars," he answered, "but they are not the same things for different people. For some, who are travelers, the stars are guides. For others they are no more than little lights in the sky. For others, who are scholars, they are problems. For my businessman they were wealth. But all these stars are silent. You--you alone--will have the stars as no one else has them--"

"What are you trying to say?"

"In one of the stars I shall be living. In one of them I shall be laughing. And so it will be as if all the stars were laughing, when you look at the sky at night . . . You--only you--will have stars that can laugh!"

And he laughed again.

"And when your sorrow is comforted (time soothes all sorrows) you will be content that you have known me. You will always be my friend. You will want to laugh with me. And you will sometimes open your window, so, for that pleasure . . .

-The Little Prince, Antoine de St. Exupery