Today Elijah Swore...

This evening Elijah ran in the house bawling.

"Mom!! I am SO SORRY!!" (No, it's not funny. He was bawling, keep in mind. Real sad, distraught tears.)

"What's wrong, Elijah?"

"MOM!! MOM, I said the bad H-word!! I said - I am SO SORRY, MOM I'M SORRY."

"What happened, Elijah?"

It turns out that one of the other boys in the neighborhood was picking on one of the littler kids, who is a particular friend of my kids. The other boy made fun of the way the little one kicked, and Elijah called him out on it. The other boy told Elijah to "shut the f- up." and Elijah responded with "Why don't YOU shut the H- up ..." the apologized to everyone and ran inside crying.

I told him that it was alright and I knew he would not say it again, and he was surely provoked, and not to worry about it. Then I went outside and broke up the game and calmed things down. The "mean" kid had already taken off - and didn't show his face again this evening.

I am learning a lot right now. I am learning that by being more of a presence in the lives of ALL of the kids out there, that they actually respect me and will get along better if I nudge them along a bit now and then. The opposite of what I would have expected and of what I tried before. I am learning that by distributing a large box of popsicles among the masses a few times a week, my kids are more liked. Yes, I will shamelessly bribe the neighborhood kids. It turns out it doesn't just make them look like the kids who have handouts to share - it makes them stronger players in the ridiculous pecking order games that are played among the groups there. Eh, I don't know if I am saying it right. But I know things are better for the kids when I stick my nose in their business a little bit. Not quite like the mom who ran shrieking into our street this evening threatening one of the kids that she was going to "kick his ass." But not an invisible character behind the window, either, available to run to or ready to call them in when things got hairy, trying not to influence to other kids. No more Mrs. Nice guy. Time to be a bit more of a player.